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It turns out that both women and men value traits such as kindness, warmth, a good sense of humour, and understanding in a potential partner – in other words, we prefer people we perceive as nice.

After all, the point of online dating is eventually to meet someone offline – and it costs more time and money to meet someone who lives further away.As a psychologist who has studied attraction, I felt certain that science could offer a better understanding of romantic attraction than all the self-help experts, pick-up artists and agony aunts in the world.And so I began researching the science of how we form relationships.One thing that struck me very early on in my forays was that everyone had an opinion about “what worked” in terms of dating.But too often those opinions were based on anecdotes, assumptions about human behaviour I knew to be wrong, or – worse – pure misogyny.

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