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Scenario 2: Susan lets herself share her full excitement with Jim. They celebrate together — loudly — and she feels seen and appreciated while in her power.They both feel closer, and best of all, she feels as though Jim Even when it's scary.Second, there's wisdom in the advice to get out of work-mode before a date, but isn't that job, not just the woman's?Is emotional availability, receptivity, and vulnerability just the woman’s responsibility?Though he congratulates her, she can tell he feels intimidated, or perhaps disinterested.She leaves the date feeling disappointed, but clear on who she is and what she's looking for.Yet that ran contrary to a slew of dating advice she'd read.In order to be authentic, she had to cross a line of gender taboo, and it just felt too risky.
She had to own that sense of empowerment or risk disappearing.When it comes to gender roles, we've been taught terribly wrong.For example, we're taught that opposites attract — and they do. Two predominantly "expressive" people of any gender can fall deeply in love, as can two predominantly instrumental people.It holds us back from our ability to love authentically.If we're single, it keeps us choosing the wrong partners.