A helpful read for all therapists who work with borderline patients." -James F. She presents a variety of mothers, including the make-believe mother, the fairy tale mother, the queen and witch mother, along with specific clinical suggestions for dealing with each type.
This spellbinding contribution to the literature provides effective treatment procedures for therapists working within the spectrum of borderline phenomenology." -Joan Lachkar, Ph. -Author, The Many Faces of Abuse and The Narcissistic/Borderline Couple Defining the narcissistic/borderline couple as "individuals who, when they are together, form a shared couple myth that gives rise to many collective fantasies," Lachkar explicates the network that underlies this type of relationship and demonstrates how two theoretical constructs -- self psychology and object relations -- can be integrated to create an effective conjoint treatment of marital pathology.
Discover specific coping strategies for dealing with issues common to children of borderline parents: low self-esteem, lack of trust, guilt, and hypersensitivity.
Make the major decision whether to confront your parent about his or her condition."Childhood lived with a borderline mother results in an unspeakable tragedy, few of the child's developmental needs are met because the mother cannot be a parent.
I have been there in my own personal life and I know what it takes to win your freedom from the soul-crushing and painful chaos of the toxic relating with a personality-disordered parent. You can heal the codependent enmeshment and over-come toxic guilt. I wasn't given discipline or boundaries just their raging abuse. Symptoms of this tragic problem include unpredictability, violence and uncontrollable anger, deep depression and self-abuse.
Until you resolve these issues and find your closure, something I work on with many adult children of a personality parent or personality disordered parents, you may well feel anxious or depressed, not trust your instincts and judgment, not know who you really are, be repeating a toxic pattern of unhealthy relationships. You have a right to make your own choices and to empower yourself in the here-and-now. I wasn't really even an after-thought, just an inconvenience. Parents with BPD are often unable to provide for the basic physical and emotional needs of their children.
Her unique examination of borderline mothers and how they relate to their children culminates in a discussion of what can be done for both from an interpersonal perspective. - Author, Impact of Narcissism"This well-researched and beautifully written book presents in graphic, specific, clinical detail overwhelming evidence to resolve any ambiguity about the relationship of the borderline mother to her children.
Wounded in ways that perpetuate suffering in other relationships, suffering inside, alone, often reeling from unresolved abandonment, invalidation, and grief.This applies to all adult children, to varying degrees, whether you yourself have also been diagnosed with a personality disorder or not. I was the family scapegoat and the one on the outside looking in. It set the stage for what was to be over 20 years of unsuccessful toxic codependent and enmeshed relating in my own life. Mahari is currently writing a memoir about her life and experience as a person who had two parents with Borderline Personality Disorder, as a person who was diagnosed herself with BPD at the age of 19 and from her perspective as someone who has recovered from BPD.Many can and will benefit from my Life Coaching Services to sort out what you need to do, how you can heal and leave the past behind and move forward in your life. The "me" that was there in pieces in childhood was further disintegrating because I wasn't being loved, nutured, or taught anything. I was abandoned in so many ways, over and over, continually throughout the course of my childhood. A legacy of pain that grows in many ways as one transitions for the child of a borderline parent or parents into an adult-child of a borderline parent or parents. There is a new section on her BPD Blog called The Diary - My Borderline Years where A. Mahari shares snipets of experience from her own life that will give you just a small peak into what her memoir will include.I was the child of two parents with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) growing up.My mother had BPD and my father had BPD and Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Both were highly invalidating and emotionally unavailable.