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Because there are large numbers of Russian and Ukrainian women seeking partners abroad, some observers assume that Slavic ladies dislike local men. Eastern European women exploring options of dating internationally are fond of Slavic men, they simply cannot find the one who fits their portrait of a good partner and at the same time likes them back.
Even western women find Russian men charming and feel they have a lot to offer, which they would love to find in their partners locally.
“If he hits you, that means he loves you,” quotes Diana her mother’s saying, the old-fashioned Slavic belief, which is the reason why domestic violence in Russia is still widely underreported — as well as most other forms of physical assault, making it a “norm” rather than a crime.
Calling her relationship with Russian men “convoluted”, the daring New-Yorker goes on describing the peculiarities of the local dating etiquette.
“It is a truth universally acknowledged that a woman wants a man who’s a gentleman at dinner and an animal in bed. This the Russian man understands,” writes the New York feminist born in the USSR.
(Today young girls are wearing flats more often and style “casual” incorporating torn jeans and Converse sneakers is becoming a new fashion fad, so you may not see Russian ladies in compulsory high heels for much longer.) “These insurmountable standards of beauty can largely be credited to the fact that there are more women than men,” admits Bruk.
This is her exact wording: Girls, apparently, are used to relentless pursuits, and unless they feel you are putting “all in”, they are not convinced that you are really interested.
You can see how it works on our site, if you feel that none of you is convinced about the other’s attraction: You because she doesn’t display any encouragement validating your interest, and she because you are not completely overwhelming her with the might of your desire to concur.
Post-USSR women are brought up to be passive, display themselves, and let men approach, otherwise you are not “modest”, which is what all guys want in their girlfriends (according to the local beliefs).
In Diana’s words, if a Russian guy likes you, nothing can stop him.