Complete idiot guide to dating
Nothing turns off a woman with self-respect more than a man rolling up on her talking about he “doesn’t want a relationship”–even if she only wants a one-night stand. I’m not assuming that there aren’t any sisters out there who don’t just get all mushy inside when a Brother rolls on her with, “Shorty, can I get some?
” I’m just saying, none of the Uppity Sisters I get turned on by that, unless there’s a little role play involved with someone they are already—ahem—well-acquainted with.
She just feels like being nice in return—that’s her responsibility, not overwhelming gratitude for finally finding this rare Canary Diamond of Black Man who actually knows how to act right.
Sidebar: And she shouldn’t slobber all over you to make you feel like a man. Definitely, if you want to get next to her, you need to be nice.
Passing out sex willy-nilly is not one of the responsibilities of being a Race Woman.
So stop with the fireside chats about “How to Save Our People”—or “African American Literature”, if you happen to be an English Professor–thinking this is going to pave the way to your getting some.
The attitude is, “How dare Black women have self-esteem when the Black community is having such a hard time?
” (Like one can’t thrive if the other is doing well.) As I told my friend, I know who my Master/Mistress is, and that is not the media, Steve Harvey, or some trifling Negro blasting misogynist curse words at me from his stereo speakers in the name of some other trifling Negro’s alleged musical/artistic license.
If you want sympathy concerning your finances, call up your mama.Above all, I am allergic to desperation when it comes to dating, and this not only includes dating Brothers, but all colors of the male persuasion.But my embracing my fabulousness does not take care of the lack of training that some Brothers have when it comes to approaching, much less “courting” Uppity Sisters.I have a dear friend who explained to me a while back why so many Black women have such a hard time dating out there.She says that because Black women are so devalued in the public eye—the media, etc., we become devalued personally, too.