Am i dating someone with borderline personality disorder 1005 christian dating
People with BPD, even in their happiest periods, experience this pervasive feeling of emptiness almost every day, and often they try and fill this with things that stimulate them.
It’s well documented that we love to turn to a quick fix; drugs, alcohol, binge eating, any risk taking behaviour that fills us up for a second.
Googling the subject, I suddenly find the internet is awash with people who have an incredibly negative and distorted view about what it’s like to date a person with BPD.
Some of the comments hit home because, from an early age, I have had an extremely tempestuous love life, but I also know it can work if both partners learn to understand each other.
This is not helpful and certainly not an easy quality to deal with in someone you share your life with, but the key to it working is understanding why the person does the things they do so you can work together to help them.
You wouldn’t ask a person with a freshly broken leg to climb three flights of stairs, and in the same way, you shouldn’t assume a person with BPD would just be able to handle certain aspects of a relationship.
You want to spend every minute of the day with them because you find them so interesting, so much fun, and so enjoyable to be around.
Having such strong emotions make people with BPD incredibly empathetic, and because of this we find it easy to connect with people on an emotional level quickly.
One of the main symptoms of BPD, which I think is almost universal, is a ‘chronic feeling of emptiness’.
Think of it as installing an emotional stair lift for that broken leg til it heals.
Imagine your partner’s friends warning them to steer clear of you.
Some people pull away for space, which is possibly the hardest thing for us to take.
This may be because it’s thought that BPD could stem from early attachment issues in childhood, so another of the main symptoms is a ‘chronic fear of abandonment (real or perceived)’.